Limerick

The once was a girl from Peru
Who cherished a love for the Shoe
Said she "I have many,
But I don't buy just any,
Only Choos or Manolos will do!"

Limerick

There was an old farmer from Cork
Who, though fond of a bit of roast pork,
Told his old friend the sow
That he couldn't think how
He could serve up her son on a fork!

Limerick

There once was a lassie called Jan
Who loved cooking cakes for her man
"The way to his heart
Is a hot custart tart,
an eclair or a summer fruit flan!"

Do you have time?

Not enough hours in the day?
Well, you can't have any more.
Not on this planet anyway.

Try Venus, the goddess of love (see a couple of photos of the ol' broad left). Our voluptuous glistening neighbour has a whopping 5,830 hours in a day. That's 243 earth days long. Long enough for you?


Oddly enough, the days on Venus last longer that the years. Confusing. And how expensive! Every day would be everyone's birthday. A "very merry un-birthday" would certainly be something to celebrate! Of course, the date would be easy to remember, always 1/1.

Unfortunately Venus has a bit of a global warming problem. Her runaway greenhouse effect results in temperatures of around 480° C /900° F.


Clearly she used of copious amounts of hairspray and other such CFC filled goods back in the cooler days. Still, the girl has great hair. What a babe!




If you can't stand the heat, there are 6 other planets to choose from (poor Pluto got kicked out). But before exploring them it might be worth making an observation inspired by Carl Sagan and War of the Worlds in equal measures:

If you didn't evolve on a planet, it is very uncomfortable to live there.

So lets go home. What are the most important things in your life and do you have time for them? Do you even have time ponder that question?

Let's put it another way.

What do you want to achieve in your life?
Stop reading and make a list now, as long or short as you like.
It's not a dress rehersal.
You are not practising.
This is it. This is your life.
Decide now.

OK. You know what you want. This is the biggest hurdle over. Now how do you find the time? Anyone in "management" knows the following lesson already but forget about the "business" perspective and focus on you.

This is your bucket. You are a little boy on the beach. Your bucket is your day. What will you fill it with?

First, fill your bucket with rocks. Rocks are the things that bring you closer to achieving that list. If you want to be a ballroom dancer, booking the dance lesson is a rock. Every bucket must have rocks, as many as you can get in.

Second you fill the space between the rocks with pebbles. Pebbles are the other important things in your day, the things you have to do but that aren't directly related to achieving your list. If you want to be a ballroom dancer but can't dance like Fred Astaire yet, you need to earn enough to support yourself and pay for your lessons. If you are starving, finding the means to get regular food is a rock, finding today's food is a pebble. There must always be time for pebbles between the rocks otherwise you won't survive.

Finally when you can get no more pebbles in, you shovel in sand. Sand is the stuff you fill your day with that stops you from doing the scary things, the big things, the things that are really important to you. Sand is the shelter of the procrastinators. Sand is daytime TV and celebrity magazines (unless you work night shifts at the job of your dreams or have a burning desire to be a paparazzi and need to do some research!). Sand is the thing that fills the stressed man's bucket. Always overfilling his bucket but always unfulfilled.

Every day, when you're working away at something ask yourself whether its a rock, a pebble or just sand. What are you putting in your bucket?

Every once in a while, make another list and make sure you're still after what you originally wanted. Maybe you'll discover you have two left feet but an incredible knack for advanced mathematics. People change, including you, your path needs to change with you.

Is this easy? No, but persevere, it will get easier with practice.

And don't worry, it could be worse: on Jupiter, there are only 10 hours in a day.

Limerick

There was a cute cat from Japan
Who loved to eat sushi with jam
His owners said "Odd!
Eating berries with cod!
He won't eat cat food from a can!"

Cold Friday

Friday afternoons are full of potential! The wintry weather is here! Another cause for celebration! The warm weather was causing havoc. Tornados in England! The gods were playing tennis with water balloons last week. Completed drenched everyone. And the wind! I suspect the Liffey was their net. Disgraceful carry-on.

Nice cold weather. Hot chocolate. Hats & scarves. Open fires. Toast.

The gentlemen
are in the UN
(and 3 women (out of 28 leaders!) today)

25 September 2007

Anyone who enjoys the wonderfulness of words can't help but enjoy watching the leaders-of-the-world with 15 minutes of fame in New York this week. (Interest in, or knowledge of, politics is not required. Nor indeed is any particular leaning!)

Naturally everyone had lots to say, although what they actually do is another matter! After all, no one appreciates the power of the spoken word better than the politician! Here's a few honourable mentions:

In showbusiness the press/critics decide and judging by volume of print devoted to this man, it would appear the star of the show today is Mahmoud Ahmadinejad...

IRANIAN PRESIDENT MAHMOUD AHMADINEJAD
"Justice recognizes the right of every one to tranquility, peace and a dignified life. Justice rejects intimidation and double standards. As the eminent daughter of the Prophet of Islam has said, "justice brings tranquility and harmony to our hearts."
"Today, the world is longing for the establishment of such justice. If humanity heeds the call of its primordial nature with firm resolve, justice will emerge. This is what the Almighty has promised and all people of good will from all religions are waiting for. If the prevailing discourse of global relations becomes one of justice and spirituality, then durable peace will be guaranteed...
"...Dear Friends and Colleagues,
"From the beginning of time, humanity has longed for the day when justice, peace, equality and compassion envelop the world. All of us can contribute to the establishment of such a world. When that day comes, the ultimate promise of all Divine religions will be fulfilled with the emergence of a perfect human being who is heir to all prophets and pious men. He will lead the world to justice and absolute peace.
"O mighty Lord, I pray to you to hasten the emergence of your last repository, the promised one, that perfect and pure human being, the one that will fill this world with justice and peace."

Certainly not the first politician in world history to mix church and state, or even the first to bring up God today (in fact, USA's G.W. Bush was the first to mention God today, if only once). Stirring (and strangely fascinating) stuff nonetheless from Mr Admadinejad...

NICARAGUAN PRESIDENT DANIEL ORTEGA
"With what authority does [George W Bush] question the right of Iran and the right of North Korea ... to nuclear development for peaceful purposes?
And even if they wanted nuclear power for military purposes, with what right can we question this? The US is the only country in the world to have launched nuclear bombs on innocent people - Hiroshima and Nagasaki..."

I'm very fond of all things American, but the man makes an interesting point...

And finally the most eloquent...

FRENCH PRESIDENT NICOLAS SARKOZY
"Iran is entitled to nuclear power for civilian purposes, but if we allow Iran to acquire nuclear weapons, we would incur an unacceptable risk to the stability of the region and the stability of the world.
In the name of France, I would say that this crisis can only be resolved if resolve and dialogue go hand-in-hand. It is in that spirit that France will act...
Attachment to one's faith, to one's language and culture, and to one's way of life, thought and belief - all this is natural, legitimate and profoundly human.
To deny that is to sow the seeds of humiliation. It stokes the fires of the very nationalism, fanaticism and terrorism we claim to be fighting.
A clash of civilisations will not be averted by forcing everyone to think and believe alike; cultural and religious diversity must be accepted everywhere and by all... "

"Stokes the fires", "Clash of civilisations"...fantastic stuff! Oh to be French! So far he's the winner in words!

And that's just from Day 1. Hailing from every corner of our little earth, they'll be talking until the 3rd October. Enjoy!

Sweet little Emily Rose
Was tired and sought some repose
But her sister, named Claire
Put a tack on her chair
And sweet little Emily rose!

Ah, siblings. Who'd have 'em?
Your mother, that's who.
Mischievous young Claire shares the universal trait of the sibling: an amazing capacity for mindless torture.

Older siblings will inevitably forge in you the disgusting survival skill of scoffing every meal in three mouthfuls. Did they ever ask "Are you gonna eat that?" before grabbing your chicken drumstick?! Sadly it means you can never go to a Michelin starred restaurant.
Hand-me-downs. Chinese burns. Never being the first to do something for the first time...

Younger siblings are a source of perpetual humiliation should anyone ever decide to fancy you. Baby-sitting duties. The lion's share of chores. Single-handedly breaking down the strict parenting standards your conscientious folks have erected for their first-born (Any thanks from the brats who stay out 'til midnight when you were due in at 10pm at their age?).

Still, there's consistency. In a world that doesn't stay still for very long, in fact, ever, at least they're Claire & Emily eternal...

As children we poured over Edward Lear's A Book of Nonsense, first published back in 1846, full of fabulous juicy limericks! Although I can't be certain, I believe this one, extracted from my childhood memories, is one of Edward's gems. Feel free to correct my grey matter!